Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Cheater Cheater, Pumpkin Eater

No, I haven't cheated yet, but yesterday I really wanted to buy something. Already!? Come on! I haven't even been doing this a week.
I'm sure that this is my brain going on the assumption that if I want something, I just go out and buy it. It obviously hasn't been reading my blog. Stupid brain.

I went outside last night to water my dead struggling garden, trees and lawn. With such oppressive heat here these past few weeks, anything that used to be green is now a lovely shade of brown.
I hooked up the hose and turned it on, then suddenly, I was soaked. The yard was dry, even though I was pointing the sprayer at the yard.
What the hell?
There seems to be some sort of malfunction with my sprayer. All of the water shoots out of the bottom instead of out of the sprayer nozzle where one would think it would come out. I bet I paid $5 for this piece of crap. So I turned off the water, wrung out my jeans and went off to find the nozzle from the backyard.

Stuck. This baby isn't budging.
Next, go look in the garage for something, anything that I can use. I'm determined now to water the lawn. It's a matter of principal. A quest to prove to myself that I can do it.
Voilia!
I found an old nozzle nestled in the garage. I attach it to the hose and turn on the water.
Well, it's more of a backwards shower than a deluge, so this will have to do.

I want a new nozzle. And soaker hoses.
How are these not necessities?

What if my foundation cracks and it looks like my house is a set piece from a terrible disaster movie?

No, I cannot just stick my thumb over the hose. That requires a certain amount of coordination which I seem to lack.

I want a new nozzle. Not just a nozzle, one of those wand kinds. So I pretend to be a fairy princess as I bring life to weeds small plants and dehydrated trees.
Okay, would you believe an Evil Queen?

I am currently re-reading Not buying it, My Year Without Shopping. I actually recommend it for anyone who is curious about this subject. Judith Levine gives you lots of facts and figures that you won't find here, but she also talks about how the entire process makes her feel.
Their project was more strict than mine is. Mine is about the clutter, so I am still allowed to consume experiences, classes, dinners out and even entertainment. They did not, however since this is such a personal experiment, I did tend to disagree on some things that they deemed necessary as I am sure they would disagree with mine.

So here I sit. Dreading the moment when I have to go outside and attempt to water the lawn again. Knowing that Judith would suck it up and just use a hose.
No, I still haven't thrown away the three nozzles that don't work.
I did get rid of 13 of my bags and purses! That surely is worth celebrating with a trip to Lowes!

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